Where all the hotties hide.

First off, the title of this post is all Thuan. It doesn't go with the entry at all but it made me laugh and I liked it. 

In the midsts of changing myself into who I want to be, I fortunately have recently modified the type of guy I'm looking for. The two month gap served a reevaluating series of events that I did not expect. I'm actually okay with dating an adult. There's a huge separation between the men and the boys that I never realized until now. I thought every guy was the coated the same but no there's different mature ones that in essence treat you with the respect a woman needs. Those are defined as the "keepers" and at my age, most of them have been married off. 

I have found one of these guys. I didn't know of any of this written above until now after the fact so I didn't appreciate it as much as I do now. Everything was equal. The effort I was putting in was being put back into me. I have never experienced that and it was good switch of pace. It was never one side. Never have I had someone treat me with so much respect as well. I've never been told by someone I was interested in that I was beautiful. I've always had the "you're hot" comments and the rush of wanting to be physical. All in all, it was at a level field and respectful. It wasn't what I was use to but I liked it.  

Once you screw up that balance, you can't go back. Expectations are formed and full filling them gets harder with time. I always find myself putting forth most of the energy in a relationship where I'm basically buying your love in hopes that you would do that same. It never is returned as the same or how you want it to be reciprocated. So for the little time I got to encounter this I realized that I'm an adult now and need an adult male that will take care of me as well as I take care of him. It's good to know that there are guys like this in the world so there is hope.